life

You are currently browsing articles tagged life.

Post 100 and Nutrisystem: Day 8

July 2, 2014 in Mindpieces | Permalink

Post 100! Well, 100th public post, that is. Heh.

Today’s menu included:
– banana nut muffin
– Cheese Tortellini and salad
– Craving Shake
– Meatloaf and mashed potatoes
– hummus and pita chips

Well I was going to go to the gym after Annapolis today, but apparently my gym clothes are in my laundry basket and not in my gym bag. And I didn’t put another set of clothes into the bag. Cuz I’m apparently dumb. Drat.

And after Annapolis I was too tired to even go to work at my real job, so it’s probably better off this way.

The meatloaf was… Odd. Nothing like what I make. And it was slathered in tomato sauce and placed on top of the mashed potatoes. So everything mixed and it was weird. Meh.

Tags: , , , , , , ,

Nutrisystem: Day 7

July 1, 2014 in Mindpieces | Permalink

Well it’s the end of day 7 and I’ve finished the Fast5. And didn’t lose a single pound. I’m hoping that it starts working better for the next 2 months of my program, since I’m already locked in for 2 months at least.

Today’s menu included:
– banana nut muffin
– Double Chocolate Caramel Bar and a salad
– Energy Shake
– Rotini and Meatballs and veggies

The banana nut muffin was very dense.

The bar was decently filling since I had a salad with it.

The rotini tasted very much like a Chef Boyardee meal. Not sure if that’s a good thing or not.

Camp went better today, but still having problems with the one student. Might be switching him to a different class if he doesn’t straighten up tomorrow. But that’s not really my call.

Tags: , , , , ,

Nutrisystem: Day 5

June 29, 2014 in Mindpieces | Permalink

Today’s menu included:
– harvest nut bar
– Energy Shake
– spicy Kung Pao noodles
– Craving Shake
– Thick Crust Pizza and veggies

The bar was decent.

Noodles were spicy as promised but nothing crazy. Though not all the liquid was absorbed by the noodles so I had to drink it.

Pizza was about the same as yesterday’s, just rectangular instead of round.

Went to the gym after D&D and then grocery shopping for more veggies.

Around 1000 calories for the day. That should offset my transgression last night.

Tags: , , , , ,

Nutrisystem: Day 4

June 29, 2014 in Mindpieces | Permalink

Today’s menu included:
– Chewy Chocolate Chip Granola bar
– Energy Shake
– Loaded Baked Potato meal and salad
– Craving Shake and veggies
– Thick Crust Pizza and veggies

The granola bar was definitely chewy as listed.

The baked potato was actually really tasty. I’ll be ordering it next month for sure.

The pizza was about a 5″ diameter. Was kinda fun to put together though. And tasted good. But not filling at all.

My friend’s birthday party was that night so that was a hard time. But I didn’t drink alcohol or soda. Just water. However, I was starving around 10pm and ordered a whole wheat chicken quesadilla. It was huge and I felt awful after eating it. But full.

I was hanging out with Keith all night at the party and at the end we talked awhile about heavier stuff. He told me that it’s unreasonable to just completely change my eating habits overnight. It’ll take time. And that beating myself up about eating something when I’m starving is silly. I’ll get better over time at this diet thing. It takes a level of willpower that I just don’t have yet.

I will try to hit the gym again on Sunday though.

I ended the day with 950 on-diet calories. And a mystery amount from the whole wheat quesadilla.

Tags: , , , ,

Nutrisystem: Day 3

June 28, 2014 in Mindpieces | Permalink

Today’s menu included:
– Cinnamon Bun Bar
– Energy Shake
– White Bean Chicken Chili and a salad
– Craving Shake and veggies
– Chicken Alfredo and veggies

The cinnamon bun bar was pretty tasty, but a little oddly textured. Probably from the extra fiber and protein and stuff they add.

I got my new shaker bottle this morning, so now I have one small one for the shakes and the large one for water at work.

The chili was spicier than I’d like. So I had to have some almond milk to offset it.

I stayed late at work to preemptively make up some of the hours I’ll miss next week while I’m working at the summer camp.

Then went to the gym again to do some uphill walking on the treadmill.

The chicken alfredo was pretty good. It was a grayish color though. But alfredo is rarely an appetizing color, I’ve learned.

Ending the day around 1300 calories.

Tags: , , , , ,

Nutrisystem: Day 1

June 25, 2014 in Mindpieces | Permalink

I’ve gained a lot of weight in the last couple years. So much that I am now 50 pounds overweight. In order to take control of my weight and my life, I’ve started Nutrisystem. Today is Day 1 of the program and of my Fast5, the first week jumpstart to lose up to 5 pounds in 7 days.

Today’s menu includes:
– Cinnamon Streusel Muffin
– Energy Shake
– Three Cheese Chicken
– Craving Shake
– Chicken Pot Pie

I added a Greek yogurt for breakfast because the muffin was so tiny, and I’m allowed 3 “powerfuels” a day, which includes yogurt. Though I’m unsure if I’m allowed yogurt during the Fast5, so I’ll try to be better about that.

The Energy shake is pretty decent. Better than some protein shakes I’ve had. It does have a tangy aftertaste though.

The Three Cheese Chicken was basically like a Cup of Soup meal. But it wasn’t bad.

I brought a Green Giant pack of frozen vegetables in light sauce for 3 of my 4 veggie servings for the day.

The Craving shake is smoother than the Energy shake. And doesn’t have the aftertaste.

I then did 30 minutes of walk/jog/running on the treadmill at the gym.

The Chicken Pot Pie was pretty tasty.

I also went to the store after the gym today and bought a bunch of healthy stuff. So I then had sugar snap peas, mushrooms, and sliced cucumbers with Greek yogurt veggie dip as my 4th vegetable of the day, and possibly 5th or 6th.

Ending the day at about 1300 calories. Over the program amount, but much less than my normal intake and mostly in healthy stuff. Also I’ve already had about 10 servings of water today.

Hooray!

Tags: , , , , , ,

Broken Inside

May 13, 2014 in Mindpieces | Permalink

I don’t know what’s wrong with me lately. I feel broken inside. Dead. Something snapped a few weeks ago and nothing has fixed it yet. I don’t know what to do about it.

I no longer have zest for life. No fervor. No passion. My hobbies don’t fulfill me the way they should. And my social engagements aren’t as happy and fulfilling as I would like them to be. Because I can’t feel anything positive. All I feel is pain. Anger. Irritation. Apathy. Depression.

I just want to curl up and cry most days now.

I’ve been emotionally distant from everyone, though trying to hide it. I’ve lost my love for everything – activities, things, people, …myself. It’s not fair to Spike. It’s not fair to me. It’s not fair to others who love me or are just starting to love me.

I need to find happiness. I need to rediscover myself and my love for life. I need another vacation. I need to figure this out.

I just want to love again.

…

…

…

But… How?

Tags: , , , ,

I’m Not Crazy, Right?

November 14, 2013 in Mindpieces | Permalink

Women have been taught to question themselves incessantly these days. Is what we’re doing okay? Is what we’re feeling the right way to feel? Are we being too sensitive? Are we crazy merely because someone said we are?

This article from the Huffington Post really says it all.

At its base, calling women “crazy” is a way of waving away any behavior that men might find undesirable while simultaneously absolving those same men from responsibility. Why did you break up with her? Well, she was crazy. Said something a woman might find offensive? Stop being so sensitive.

The idea of the “crazy” woman is so vague and nebulous that it can apply to just about any scenario.

“Crazy” has become this all-encompassing word to describe a woman’s behavior. I’ve heard men say I was crazy. Hell, I’ve heard it as why they broke up with me, but that doesn’t mean ANYTHING. Especially when the breakup was mutual or because he couldn’t cope with the normal relationship emotional needs.

I’m not crazy and just because someone says I am something, doesn’t make it true. Sure, I have some emotional issues, but so does everyone. Everyone has baggage. But really, when I think about it, maybe those “issues” are just what society has forced me to think of as problems and maybe they’re just completely normal, female emotions.

I’m not crazy. I’m normal. And there’s nothing anyone can say to change that, because all the proof I need is inside my head, inside my heart, and that’s all I need. Just me.

Tags: , , ,

One Month Down

May 28, 2013 in Mindpieces | Permalink

So today marks officially one month. Spike came to my party on Saturday and it was kinda hard to be around him. I’m not sure how to function as just his friend. I’m working on moving on already but it’s slow going and emotionally taxing.

The guy I’ve been talking to, lets call him Badass, is still talking to me and definitely likes me. We finally met on Sunday and it went really well. We’re supposed to go to my hometown’s carnival on Thursday. So that should be pretty awesome. He even texted me after we parted ways with how much he liked me and how well he thought it went. Again, I’m unsure of how I feel about starting a new relationship just yet, but I know that it’s probably the best way to get over Spike.

Tags: , ,

Two weeks and counting

May 11, 2013 in Mindpieces | Permalink

It’s been two weeks since Spike and I broke up. Things have been up and down since then, and it’s been a little rough. Like with many of my breakups, I wasn’t even sure at first how to continue with my life. I felt things would be so different without him around. And while they are different, they’re also not necessarily bad. And we’re trying to still be friends which is helpful. Though I do really miss him sometimes.

I’m working on just being me and enjoying life by myself and with friends. I find that I’m happiest when I’m with friends like TinyFists and Hiker. Whether we’re hiking or hot tubbing or just chilling and drinking wine or martinis. I’ve even been using iMoodJournal on my phone to track how I’m feeling. It’s been really helpful for tracking my moods and finding when I feel my best. It just happens that those times are when I’m being social and with friends.

In order to connect with new people and make new friends or relationship possibilities, I’ve joined OkCupid. I’ve been talking to a couple guys on there and have been weeding through what I want and don’t want. I found that you discover a lot about yourself when you have to fill out a profile for a dating site and have to shuffle through so many profiles of others, looking for all the traits you want in a significant other. While I’m not necessarily ready for a new relationship just yet, I’m not going to run away from something that seems like it could be promising for long-term. These things happen when you’re not particularly looking for them.

I’ve been emailing and texting with a guy fairly regularly for about a week, and it seems like it could be promising. So that’s a positive thing that’s been happening. He’s been encouraging me to do things for me and is helping me find the things that I actually like to do alone. He’s been helping me uncover the reasons for why I am the way I am and figuring out what needs to be fixed before being in a new relationship. If nothing else, he’s very flattering and makes me feel good about myself, making my self-esteem skyrocket, which is always a good thing for me and definitely something I need right now.

Tags: , ,

« Older entries § Newer entries »